Give me courage to show my faith

Lord today I helped at the Junior High youth group. We talked about Peter and John's extreme faith when they healed the lame man. When I was talking to people about it I realized how strong my faith is. I think I could stand improvement when it comes to sharing the word. Peter and Paul both went out and talked about how the lord helped them heal that man even though the Romans told them not to. They didn't let anyone get in the way of their christian duty. I don't know why I don't share my faith more with others. I tend to hog it to myself. Maybe I just am not in the right mindset at school. I look around the halls and see all of these people who need to hear that you love them and what you have done for them, but I don't do anything about it. Most weeks at JV (junior high youth group) I challenge the kids to share the gospel with one person, but maybe I should challenge myself in the same way. So lord use me. I want you to help me find someone at school who is desperately in need of a relationship with you and let me be the bridge between you, or at least the one who points them in the right direction. I suppose I couldn't really be the bridge since Jesus is the way to get to you, but you know what I mean. Help me tell someone the good news. Also lord I would like to lift up a praise to you. I'm so thankful that you've been speaking to me lately. I have struggled less with temptations for the last couple weeks, and I know that it is thanks to you.

I'm a humbled man,
I have sinful ways,
You give me life,
For this I praise.
Amen

(just trying a new sign off. I kinda like it :-D)

patience

Lord I have something I need to talk with you about. I haven't been the best person I can be lately, and it's really bugging me to be honest. I have had some troubles with my brother. We aren't getting along much lately. Its partially him and partially my lack of patience. I have been less than understanding with him lord and thats not cool. I need to be more respectful of him. I feel bad mostly, because until today I didn't really realize that he was having a rough time with his own problems. I know he doesn't need my crap on top of those problems, so lord help me be a better brother to him. I am supposed to love others as I love myself, but I haven't done that for him lately. Thanks lord.

Speak lord, your servant is listening.

Reflections on missed opportunities.

Well lord today I want to lift up a praise to you. I want to thank you for helping me with getting into Cedarville. I got my acceptance letter today!! That is very nice, but I do have a heavy heart tonight. I have been thinking about my friend Travis who died two years ago. I miss him very much. I can't help but pull out pictures and other memorable things from when we were friends. Travis and I grew up together. We were best friends ever since kindergarten and he would have been graduating with me this spring. I have pictures from birthday parties and from when we went to see WCW (wrestling) in Peoria when we were kids. I remember doing tons of things with him like going fishing and camping out at his grandparents. I miss all of the less than good things we did too like when I would go hang out with him when I was grounded from him or when we took the cans from the back of the VFW to get money to buy worms for fishing. I miss him a lot Lord. He was my best friend and I loved the time I had with him. I just regret one thing. I had him come to church with me a few times and he went on his own or with other friends too, but I feel like I should have told him about you lord. I didn't realize it until it was too late. I didn't think about it until I was carrying his casket with all of the other guys. It was rough looking at him laying there icy cold not knowing where he is now. I just wish I could find some comfort in that, but I cant. You say that any man who accepts your son as the one and only savior that we will have eternal life with you, but I don't know if Travis did that. That is why it is rough for me whenever I think about this. All I have is memories and dreams that someday I will get to see him again in heaven, but until then lord all I can say is I will thank you for showing me something through Travis. LIFE IS SHORT. I don't have time to mess around I need to live EVERY day for you. It makes me cry to this day thinking about what I should have told him, but I don't have to let it happen again. So lord work through me to spread your great word to everyone. Speak lord your servant is listening.

Self Doubt & Patience

Well God, I have good news and I have indifferent news. I'll start with the good news. I have been talking to some track coaches at Olivet Nazarene University and to a coach at Cedarville and it looks like I will be able to do track if I keep working hard. This is good, but I always have a problem. I keep telling myself that I am not good enough to do it. I really need to stop, Lord, because I do believe that you gave me athletic ability as a gift and I can use it as a tool to glorify you, but I just have trouble with my self-esteem. I just hope that you can keep helping me to realize that I am a special gift and I am good at stuff. The only other news I had today was that Rachel my girlfriend got into Cedarville and I want to stop and give you praise for that. I think it is a great school for her, I just hope that It is a good school for me too, because I really like it. I have been waiting on them to get news of my acceptance or rejection and I just hope that it is taking a while because they still had my old address. When they decided. So basically what I am asking for god is for a little patience on my part to hear back from them. Thanks god I think I'm pretty much done for the day here. I'll talk to you very soon. Love you, Mike.